Archive for the ‘Tunage’ Category

Purging

November 21, 2012

I’ve been slipping through the years
My old clothes don’t fit like they once did
So they hang like ghosts of the people I’ve been

-You Can Do Better Than Me, Death Cab for Cutie


The day I had to put Abby down, I thought about taking off work but figured after so much crying and reflection, it would be better to stay busy. I worked all afternoon and happened to have plans to hang out with Ern that evening. She lives about an hour-and-a-half south of me, so we sometimes meet at a Panera that’s halfway between us to chat and work on whatever crafts are currently occupying our attention. That night as I sipped on iced coffee and knitted, in the back of my mind I’d preemptively begun worrying about going home to an empty, Abby-less apartment. In fact by the time I actually got home, I’d worked myself up into quite a tizzy, thinking I would have a meltdown and cry for 100 hours and not be able to sleep and howl pitifully at the moon. When I finally walked through the front door, I felt a twinge in my gut but was determined not to obsess. Without a plan, I wandered into my bedroom closet, which was a HELLACIOUS mess, and dove into the disarray head first. That poor closet had been neglected for far too long and was full of stuff that needed to be sorted and donated. I ended up spending hours in there and the fruit of my labor was several garbage bags full of clothes and purses. As I’d been losing weight, I’d given some clothes away but was afraid to deliberately go through my entire closet and purge, thinking it akin to asking the God of Cellulite to smite me with hundreds of wobbly pounds. That night though, I managed to overcome my ridiculousness and let myself live in the present moment. It’s finally time to let go of all of this, I thought. Before I stumbled into bed, I hauled all the bags to my living room, planning to make a Goodwill run as soon as possible. But as it often does, life got in the way and my piles sat neglected for a few weeks until tonight when after a bit of straightening, I decided I had to get that stuff out of my apartment. I felt sort of melancholy loading the bags into my car, not because I’ll miss my clothes but because I got the courage to pass them on the day I lost Abby. That really good thing happened on a really sad day. Funny how life works, isn’t it?

Do Me, Baby?

June 8, 2012

A local radio station played 90s hits all morning, which I loved especially since I came of age during that golden era. I was shocked at how completely disparate the songs were. How can Bell Biv DeVoe’s Do Me! belong to the same decade as Weezer’s Undone – The Sweater Song?? I remember loving both songs, one being more representative of middle school and the other of heading off to college. I could not get over how scandalous the lyrics to Do Me! are.

Backstage, under age, adolescent
How ya doin?
“Fine,” she replied
I sighed, “I like to do the wild thing!”
Action took place
Hey, kinda wet
Come on, don’t forget
The J, the I, the M, the M, the Y, y’all
I need a body bag

That is horrifically awful! And yet at the time, I was so far from sexually active that they were just meaningless words to me.

It was also pleasant to be reminded of Swatches, which are mentioned in Do Me! I had several and loved them all. The last one I had got stolen at a party my senior year. Two friends of mine were trying to throw me in a pool but were kind enough to take it off first. Thankfully, they had mercy and didn’t actually throw me in the water but I never saw my Swatch again. Mem’ries!

By the time I discovered Weezer, I was much more maudlin and therefore appreciated their equally ridiculous lyrics:

I’m me
Me be
Goddamn
I am
I can
Sing and
Hear me
Know me

If you want to destroy my sweater,
Hold this thread as I walk away

What exactly that means is beyond me but it sounded tortured and bizarre, so I loved it.

In other news, my preferred exercise has flip-flopped. Last year, I mostly swam laps. I would occasionally walk on the treadmill but hated every minute of it, as it was awfully uncomfortable hauling around that much weight. Nowadays, I find that I vastly prefer walking and dread swimming laps. I’m making myself do it once a week but I take walks otherwise. I love being outside and I especially love getting to listen to music while I walk. I turn inward and reflect and process and mull – good for my bod and my soul!

Facebook FAIL

February 22, 2011

I’ve just narrowly survived my first big Facebook gaffe, complete with the requisite mortification and self-loathing. When you get right down to it, it’s clearly Aaron Sorkin’s fault. He had to write such a brilliant screenplay*, which lured me in from the first preview. Even before I saw any previews, I heard that Trent Reznor wrote the music for The Social Network and being a big fan of his, was very excited to hear what he came up with. (For the record (haha), the songs he wrote are INCREDIBLE. I had chills throughout the entire film. You can download the whole album for just a few bucks at Amazon.)

The first trailer I saw was set to Kanye West’s latest single, Power, which totally blew my mind and seriously spoke to the film’s themes:


It was classic Kanye: anthemic, packed with meaning, confessional but unapologetic. I immediately downloaded the MP3 and waited anxiously for his whole album to be released.

Then I saw a second trailer, which had an amazing choral arrangement of Radiohead’s Creep floating in the background:


Being a life-long choir geek, this sent me over the edge. I told B about it and we both became obsessed with the song and other music by the same choir, Scala & Kolacny Brothers. A few weeks ago, B told me the choir was performing in Chicago. He had 2 other friends, J & G, who wanted to go as well so the minute the tickets went on sale, I secured 4 of them for us. I was so excited, I immediately went on Facebook and announced that I’d just gotten tickets and tagged everyone who was attending. A few minutes later, I got an anxious text from B asking me to untag his friends post-haste because one was taking the other as a surprise for his birthday. Ooops. I felt awful, especially since I’ve met his friends and they’re adorable and sweet. I immediately deleted my post. I know that Facebook e-mails you when you’re tagged in a post but I wonder if they rescind the e-mail when that post is deleted. I hope so. B said J & G hardly ever use Facebook and hadn’t heard from either so I’m hoping I haven’t ruined the surprise.

Have you made any faux pas on Facebook? Please tell me you have so I don’t feel like such a dolt.

*Sometime over cocktails, let’s discuss the more pertinent issue, whether or not the story Sorkin told is true. I did a lot of research after seeing the movie twice and pretty much concluded that while it’s fascinating and packed with meaty, enthralling dialog, Sorkin attributed a lot of sentiment and motivation to Mark Zuckerberg that’s simply not accurate. However it’s perhaps inadvertently germane in that it’s a movie about Facebook, this new, incredible tool that often misshapes our views of people.

The ‘bucks Redeems Itself?

November 28, 2010

Oh, Starbucks. We’ve never been BFFs. I’ve always hated that you don’t recycle and your prices are ridiculous but sometimes, your convenience cannot be denied. In particular lately I’ve been enjoying your oatmeal a few mornings a week. I love that it’s plain and whole grain and toppings come on the side, so I can use the nuts and dried fruit, but skip the brown sugar. That said, I noticed that your drive-thru menu changed; you stopped listing your smallest bev size (infuriatingly named “Tall”) on the menu, even though it’s still available. That kind of customer manipulation really pisses me off. Fortunately, I wasn’t the only one who was annoyed, so you got a well-deserved rubbing and now Tall’s back on the menu, where it belongs. Shame on you for leaving it off to begin with, but I’m glad you came to your senses.

P.S. There’s a Starbucks commercial running right now with an adorable song playing in the background, Snow Day by Matt Pond PA. Enjoy!


It Was Inevitable

November 18, 2010
  • How is it that we’re 18 days into NaBloPoMo and I’m just now resorting to the bullet format?
  • Good news: I found my cough syrup that has codeine in it. Somebody’s gonna sleep like a baby tonight!
  • As much as I hate saying this, it can no longer be denied that The Office has jumped the shark.
  • What are your plans for Thanksgiving? My Mom is coming into town and we’re hoping to relax and maybe do a bit of thrifting.
  • I want these boots, this couch, and this bench.
  • Tomorrow my former coworkers and I are indulging in our annual Stomach-Stretching Spectacular. We go to a local Italian restaurant with an over-the-top lunch buffet and eat enough to prepare our tummies for Thanksgiving. It’s the responsible thing to do.
  • This summer I saw a documentary about Bill Withers, after which I was obsessed with his incredible music. One of my faves is Ain’t No Sunshine:


NaNaNa November

November 12, 2010

Tonight I’ve got a brand new playlist for you. It’s loaded with good tunes. Enjoy!

POP-OUT PLAYER

We Know How To Live, Baby

November 3, 2010

Attention: This post is optimized for reading while listening to Gwen Stefani sing about luxurious linens:


Oh, how I love Target’s elusive orange clearance sticker. Through careful study, I’ve ferreted out the lower-profile endcaps at my local Targets where I’m most likely to find good deals. Even if I just pop in to buy dish soap, I always cruise by a few key locations to make sure I’m not missing any deep discounts. Several Saturdays ago, I found some plush bath towels for dirt cheap and satin pillowcases for less than $3/each. I’ve never had them before but it sounded like a bed linen I could get behind. I’ve also read that satin pillowcases are more gentle on your hair while you’re sleeping, so you’ll end up with less damage and split ends. I don’t know if that part is true, but I’ll report back with my findings.

So far, I’m not sure I like them. For one thing, it’s static-cling season and they seem to be extra conductive. Last night I couldn’t relax because my bangs kept sticking straight up. The satin feels lovely against my skin but is so slippery, I can’t properly stack and fold my pillows without them shifting all over the place. Maybe I should get new pillows but I can see that kicking off a cycle that ends with me having to buy a new house perfectly suited to satin pillowcases. Alas, sometimes the tantalizing clearance sticker leads me awry.

Edited to add: I forgot to mention that I tweeted about my new pillowcases and Target totally tweeted me back!

Target Tweet

“Eyes Like Potatoes”

May 21, 2010

Last night at water aerobics, I heard a blast from the past, La Isla Bonita, on the radio. It reminded me that when I was younger, I thought the lyrics “A young girl with eyes like the desert” (:36) were instead “A young girl with eyes like potatoes.” It never made sense to me but it didn’t matter because I loved Madonna and if she wanted to sing about tubers, by God she could.

The class was fun and I was soooo happy to be back in the water. Next time I’m bringing my goggles so I can swim laps. I have two pair and strangely enough, B & I used them recently for a very juvenile non-water prank. Unfortunately, we couldn’t keep our composure and pretty much ruined the joke, except for the hilarity involved with us wearing goggles at a restaurant.

This afternoon over IM, I tried to teach my Dad how to type a tilde (~). My instructions were so confusing, I nearly peed my pants from laughing. Finally he just said, “I had better stick with my more limited keys.” Ha!

Buh-Bye Winter Coat

March 22, 2010

The sunny weather has done wonders for my mood. And just to show spring how serious I am about its arrival, I put away my winter coat and am not under any circumstances getting it out again. I realize this decision has the potential to make me look like an ass but the chances are high that I’ll look like an ass regardless of whether or not I’m wearing a coat, so I’ll risk it.

I am →this← close to calling the mayor directly to yell at him about the pothole situation in Indianapolis. It is ridiculous! They are everywhere and they aren’t wimpy dips in the road but formidable canyons, wreaking havoc on my car’s alignment. I just took the Goose in to have one of her speakers fixed and despite the fact that my tires are new AND my car was aligned after I got the tires, two of my wheels are bent and it will cost almost $200 to fix the problem. NOT FAIR. It’s not like I’m a reckless driver who doesn’t pay attention but often times these pits are unavoidable or I don’t see them until it’s too late. The road leading away from Moxy’s condo is so treacherous, I don’t even try to drive on the right side anymore. I make sure the way is clear and pretend I’m in London until I’ve passed the potholes. A friend told me her father-in-law once complained to the city about potholes messing up his car’s alignment and they gave him money to fix it. What are the odds of things working out so smashingly for me?

I made a spring mix featuring lots of new-to-me artists I’ve been stalking for the past few months and some familiar favorites. Roll down your windows, crank it, and enjoy!

POP-OUT PLAYER

Let the Sun Shine In

March 4, 2010


This afternoon I was heading back to my office after an appointment when the sun finally came out and fluttered those coquettish lashes of hers just as 1901 came blaring over my car speakers. And Internet? In that moment, I was happy. The sun was only out for a few minutes — she’s been a fickle harlot lately — but it was enough time for those rays to tickle my nose with the promise of spring, giving me the resolve to bear winter’s end.

Yesterday morning on a local radio show I sometimes listen to, the DJ read a list of words and phrases that are overused and should be retired. He insinuated “that’s what she said” falls into this category but obviously was mistaken because really, truly, it makes me laugh every time. It got me thinking about what would be on my redundancy list and I came up with a few that are remarkably like nails scraping down a chalkboard:

  1. Like – This can be especially problematic among millennials.  The other night I *cough* happened to catch an episode of The Real Housewives of Orange County and wanted to pour scalding hot wax in my ears during a conversation between two teenagers. Every other word was “like” and I found myself focusing on each appalling instance instead of the point, which was so devoid of significance that it may as well have been surmised by watching a goat eat a lightbulb. I should note that I too am sometimes guilty of using “like” unnecessarily but I make an effort to be careful as I’m afraid it makes you sound like a dolt.
  2. Literally – Unfortunately some folks are using this word for emphasis when they mean “figuratively.” “I literally died laughing.” Really? Did you die? Because you’re right here telling me this story. Apparently I’m not alone in my irritation — there’s at least one blog and a Facebook group dedicated to its reparation, but now we’re in sort of a chicken/egg situation because I also hate the over-abundance of silly groups on Facebook and joined this one in protest. (God, this is making me sound like a crotchety old be-otch.)
  3. It is what it is – And finally the ubiquitous, inimitable poster child for useless cliches, so completely bastardized that you might very well convey your meaning by instead saying “ti-esrever-dna-ti-pilf-nwod-gniht-ym-tup-i.”
  4. Honorable mentions – “Dude” and tacking “right now” at the end of every sentence.

I’m sure I say many things that drive people bonkers. What sorts of words and phrases irritate you?


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 329 other followers