Top 5 Reasons I Don’t Go To the Indy 500

5. I could get dirty.

4. I could perspire.

3. I could break a nail.

2. I can go to the McDonald's drive through to watch people drive in a circle.

And the number one reason I don't go to the Indy 500… *drum roll* 

1. I can lose my wallet and keys at home.

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