Curious Poorge

Poorge and I dated before I met Russ. He’s tall, British, sweet, techish, really into music, and did I mention sweet? He’s also quite a nervous person. After we’d go out, he’d apologize for not doing things he said he wanted to do, like give me a back rub. I tried making a move but I’ve never been the movemaker and am just not comfortable with it. (I know that is a completely unfair double standard but we have to bare the children so it evens out. ;)) I kept saying, “We can just be friends” and he’d say, “No no. That’s not what I want.” This went on for months. I tried to be patient, but I feel like if someone really wants to be with you, they’ll eventually do something about it.

Poorge and I live about a half an hour from each other, but I drove most of the time because he doesn’t like driving and gets very nervous. He wouldn’t hesitate to cancel plans when the weather was even the slightest bit bad. I know that in England, not everyone drives how we do here, but I already have a thing about this issue because Chris (one of my exes) didn’t drive. He kept saying he’d get his license but didn’t for years and years. I definitely grew to resent that, which certainly came into play with Poorge. Overall, I think he just wasn’t in the right place and was extremely unsure of himself.

Eventually I met Russ and we started dating exclusively. Poorge and I still chatted online sometimes, but didn’t hang out. When I broke up with Russ, Poorge asked if I wanted to hang out. He also apologized for “being a coward” when we were dating. I said, “Don’t be silly!” because I didn’t want him to feel bad or uncomfortable. Poor Poorge! 😦 We talked about hanging out several times, but always ended up canceling or rescheduling. Last week he asked if I wanted to get ice cream. I planned to get an oil change Saturday and my Honda dealer is in the town where he lives, so I suggested we meet afterward.

He called me in the early afternoon and we talked about where to meet. He asked if I was hungry and I told him I’d eaten lunch. He said he hadn’t and was ravenous. I suggested he eat lunch and then we could meet but I think he really wanted some company because he said, “No I can wait. I don’t mind.” So we met around 3 p.m. and talked about where he’d eat lunch. Poorge is VERY indecisive so it took a ridiculous amount of time to decide. I kept saying, “I’m not hungry so we can go wherever you want.” He would start to make a decision, and then suggest alternatives. I think he does that because he’s unsure of himself, which I can relate to but after 10 minutes, I was getting impatient. He finally picked Subway. We chatted and I played with his new PDA/mp3 player/camera/mobile phone while he ate. (I’m thinking about getting something of that nature.) Next we went to DQ for ice cream. He offered to drive but I said I would because I know he’s uncomfortable with it. I wanted to get 13 large pecan cluster Blizzards but instead, I got a medium cone and it was YUMMY and satisfying. We went back to his place and watched The Da Vinci Code (which was definitely NOT illegally downloaded) while we ate our ice cream. I really liked the movie. It was entertaining and suspenseful although I had the sense that Tom Hanks was miscast. Audrey Tautou played Sophie Neveu, a French cryptographer and government agent who helps Tom Hanks’ character solve the mystery. I love her – she’s so beautiful and talented. I haven’t read the book but I understand it’s incredible. Just having seen the movie, I can agree that the book author, Dan Brown, is obviously extremely creative and gifted.

It was fun hanging out with Poorge. He’s always so sweet and has lots of interesting things to say and experiences to share. I think it will be great for us to be friends but I don’t think I want anything more. For one thing, I’m trying to stay very focused on my health right now. Also, Poorge’s Mom is thinking about moving back to England, which he is considering as well. And finally, Russ was ÜBER-insecure and always stalking me about completely ridiculous concerns. I can’t imagine Poorge doing that, but I still want a very secure, confident boy.

One other thing to note is that Poorge and his Mom live in a house together. Obviously, it’s much cheaper for them. I know their situation is unique because they moved at the same time from England to a totally new country and only knew one another. Unfortunately, I’m still a little uncomfortable with the ‘I’m over thirty and live with my Mom thing.”

P.S. The lead character in The Da Vinci Code is claustrophobic because he fell in a well when he was a boy and was trapped, treading water for days. The thought of that really freaked me out. Can you imagine how awful it would be? Then this morning, I read this story. Yikes! Poor thing.

P.P.S. When I was dating Poorge, I told Bernard everything that was going on and he would get annoyed and say, “That’s how I would be if I were dating! Girls need to be more patient. It’s not fair that we have to make all the moves.” WTF? I was VERY patient but at some point, you have to deal with the reality of the situation.

P.P.P.S. Bernard too was the KING of sending really overt signals, but not making a move, and instead, pouting and treating me differently when I dated other boys. I will admit that I didn’t get the clues he sent because I was a total dumbass.

P.P.P.P.S. What the hell is wrong with me?? 😉


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