B: did you hear about the newest reality show
B: I laughed and though “Mims and I must watch this together”
Me: are you kidding??? It’s a dream come true!!
Me: Why are we not starring in it?
B: I was asked to exec. produce it
B: but I had a a stuffy nose and a hangnail
Me: I was assigned the Assistant to the Jazz Hands Instructor position
B: I did accept doing warm-ups/volcalizing exercises for the finalists
Me: Me-ee May-ay Mah-ah Mow-ow Mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
B: I know you know this..
B: but my IT guy can literally come on to my ‘puter remotly and move his mouse/see my screen
B: I was sweting when he went on to exploerer because of my internet porn
B: it’s like magic
Me: It’s called Remote Desktop. It’s very fancy and modern, like the can opener or the wheel!
B: it’s scary
Me: I have a feeling you’re savvy enough to have the Internet on a disk
B: but, because of the technology…
B: tyhey could transfer all my itunes files over
B: …to my new laptop
Me: In the words of JT, “Ayo, I’m tired of usin’ technologaaay. Why don’t you sit down on top of me?”
B: (writing that down)
Me: P.S. Maybe you could ask your IT guy for an external hard drive that could be dedicated to storing your porn. That way you’ll be able to keep track of porn-related vs. work-related files, like that mysterious Word document called “Team approach”
P.S. Have you noticed a pattern in the way B initiates conversations with me? Like, Owe-Emm-Geee!!