I’m writing this to vent instead of doing what I want to, which is shout and throw poo at a certain smug, self-important jerk of the IT variety. People like him are the reason I’m sometimes reluctant to say I work in IT. I don’t want anyone to assume I’m one of those obnoxious know-it-alls who likes to lord authority over people just because he/she can breezily regurgitate useless trivia like the maximum number of rows allowed in Excel*. This smarmy bastard is without a doubt the most insufferable lout I’ve ever dealt with. True, he may know some arcane Solitaire mods but I’ve been invited to enough parties to have amassed an impressive knowledge of drinking games. SO THERE!
How was your weekend? Mine flew by too quickly, especially since I had to work most of the time. The ginormous, impending Web site launch grows closer and closer so it looks like I’ll be working most every day for the next few weeks. Will you bring me treats occasionally to buoy my spirits? But please none of those new Starbucks tea lattes. I LOVE hot and iced tea but tried one and wanted to hurl.
Poor Abbs woke me up chirping at 5 a.m. a few days ago. I rushed her outside where she became…well…sick as a dog. At one point, she was so exhausted she just laid down in the snow and my heart broke into a million pieces. Fortunately within 24 hours, she was as good as new, save a little pungent gas which can easily be blamed on my ill-mannered invisible friend Norman.
*For the record, it’s 1,048,576 in Excel 2007.
Edited to add: I know my masthead is woefully out of date but until I’m over the hump, can we just pretend it’s still timely? If it would help you maintain the holiday spirit, you’re welcome to give me presents.