- After making a fuss, finding out my dryer wasn’t broken and instead only need its fuse box switch flipped. (To my credit, I figured out that’s why I didn’t have any hot water when I first moved in but it didn’t even occur to me with the dryer. I did check to make sure it was plugged in. WIN.)
- Confronting the painful reality that my tendency to burst into song spills over into the classroom. After I taught recently the assistant gibed, “You made it through without singing this time!”
- Casually leading the cable guy into my boudoir only to be confronted with the remnants of last night’s tryst IN PLAIN VIEW. “Yes, that’s the cable outlet…right beside that prophylactic wrapper.”
- Infecting my work computer with some heinous, unstoppable malware at 5 p.m. on Friday. I felt obliged to call the emergency IT number to give them a heads-up on the off chance the problems might be virus-related. I hated to do it but figured that embarrassment was preferable to the shame of coming to work on Monday and finding out my doltery disabled all the company’s workstations. When you’re in the IT field, hanging your head before a smug IT support guy is on par with slamming your hand in a drawer.
- Going to the Mc D’s drive-thru for breakfast often enough to be recognized and quoted my order without uttering a word. “Plain bagel with sausage and a large unsweetened iced tea, right?” (Don’t worry. I occasionally mix it up with whole grain bread and peanut butter.)
- The inevitable lascivious heckling that results when your boss’s boss grins and greets you with “Hey [my real name here]” but everyone thinks he said “Hey baby!”
- Begrudgingly laughing out loud more than once while watching Superbad.
P.S. Faithful reader Don Kramer sent me an IM this morning: