What a Drain

When last I left you, I’d had my guts ripped out, burst into tears, and pissed my pants. Unfortunately all that did nothing to prepare me for the shame of having a drain for a week. It was a little plastic bulb attached to the end of about a foot-and-a-half of tubing stuck in a hole in my tummy and leading down to the nub where what I’ve begun to call my “GD GB” used to be. The bulb would fill with gut juice and had to be emptied several times a day. My surgeon took this extra measure to make sure bile wasn’t leaking into my abdominal cavity. I know that many people have had much more complicated surgery and post-surgical inconveniences but the whole tube-to-my-innards thing pretty much skeeved me out to the max. It was also very difficult to hide. My Mom and I did our best with lots of surgical tape and careful posing but it still peeked out from under my shirt’s hem the few times I left the house and always solicited “Is that a colostomy bag?” looks.

The pain medicine made me sleep a lot so my days ran together. I soon realized that even a few days in a hospital bed can set you back physically, which was especially disheartening since I’d been so diligent about going to water aerobics the last few months. I’ll spare you the dets, but as can apparently happen after GD GB removal surgery, my gastrointestinal processes were, um, less than favorable. Still I was less sore and more mobile each day and had begun eating some normal food. Then a few days before I was scheduled to have the staples and drain taken out, I started feeling very overwhelmed and panicky. I found myself crying inconsolably and having to dig deep into my bag of coping tricks to stay calm. GREAT! Thanks universe for choosing this low-key time to lob another shitball my way!

To be continued…

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7 Responses to “What a Drain”

  1. Wendy Says:

    I stumbled across your blog the other day and it made me laugh out loud so I thought I would check back. Little did I know of all the drama I would find today. My mom pretty much had the same ugly GB. Her doctor said it had petrified. She ended up with about 8 or 10 incisions. Still, I think you win for the worst ever GB surgery. Hope you’re feeling better by the time you read this.

  2. tmc Says:

    oh dear! I’m sorry to hear about your complications. I do hope that the fact that you’re up and blogging means you’re on the mend. Take care of yourself!

  3. Kris Says:

    Oh, Miss Mymsie. My heart just breaks for you. This is maybe going to sound like a dumb question, but could the anxiety be a side-effect from any pain meds you were taking? (I don’t know when you were sprung from the hospital, so I’m not sure when this all happened, or how far behind we are.)

    You’re so overdue for a whole heap of goodness. I hope it finds you. Like, “now”, would be good.

  4. lydia Says:

    Just wanted to say I’m thinking of you and hope you get some good days SOON! Ugh, what an ordeal!!

  5. A-frame Says:

    Kris’ idea about side effect-related anxiety sounds possible. Even more simply, I wonder if it’s just (huh – “just”) an after-effect of the experience itself. After I was in a car accident, my doc said sometimes people experience depression after such an event. For those among us who are plagued more by anxiety demons than depressive tendencies, maybe the after-effect is heightened anxiety. Your nervous system is flipping out in the way it knows best.

    Yeah, cuz I’m a doctor…not. *ahem*

  6. Amy Says:

    I hope you are feeling terrific now!! Or at least a lot better. 🙂

  7. westwardbound Says:

    Oh my word. What a horrible ordeal! I will tell you that natural childbirth is more glamorous than what you’ve been through–including the pooping in public! You are a freakin’ WARRIOR.

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